she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
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