I got chris browned last night
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
