Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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