Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
