Where did you get a picture of my penis
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
