it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
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basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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