I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
