hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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