took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize