don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week