Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
i just google imaged poop.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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