I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
