he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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