North Korea, Best Korea!
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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