fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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