im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Randomize
