so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
