Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
