My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
