Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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