have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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