Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
