I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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