Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
