No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
