So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
