the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
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