I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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