It's just like the Real World with babies
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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