my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
