I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
