The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize