hell yes lets make some ravioli
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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