Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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