its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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