i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
