i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
