I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
