Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
