Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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