My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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