whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Randomize
