Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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