alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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