how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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