I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
