I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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