Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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