Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
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God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize