Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
